A few days ago David invited me to join this meme that he and Catherine have started. Going around the world in 80 clicks. I loved the idea but couldn’t figure out what to write. And then Boo tagged me and I realised that time was running out. The truth is, I’m at a loss for words. I have been writing an entire blog on being a mother for the last 3 years. Heck – every single day I show you what I love about this gig. To force me to narrow it down to five measly things is just plain mean!!
So I used Catherine’s post as a launch pad and realised that my viewpoint was diametrically opposite to hers. I love motherhood in itself.
Don’t get me wrong. I love each of my babies in particular – the Bean’s big curious eyes, the Brat’s generous hugs, the Bean’s little finger held up sternly and a ‘What did I tell you to do’ and the Brat’s ability to look at a dusty playground and call it ‘beautiful’… But I’m also aware that I just love motherhood.
Like Catherine – I often run out of diapers, I can never find a pair to a shoe and I often wish I had organised a better playdate – but hell, that is what makes me a perfect mother. If I had it down any better, I’d be the daycare teacher. This is what makes me a mom. This imperfection that fades in the face of the enthusiasm I bring to the table.
I love the way it’s made me move beyond myself, my needs, my career, my personal space, beyond the I, me and myself. .. and think about another human being. It’s amazing how boundaries are redefined, space is redesigned, priorities realigned and none of it feels like a burden or a pain. It just feels like another route… a meandering path that eventually gets us to the same place that others seem to be in a rush to get through – just having a lot more fun, learning a lot more and sleeping a lot less!
So without further ado, I give you my list of the things I love about being a mother.
- I love how motherhood has made me fearless. I understand metaphors about tigresses and cubs. I fight injustice because I want a better world for my children. I haven’t done it yet, but throwing myself in front of a train for them isn’t a scary thought either. Smelly, poopy, pukey, sticky, suspicious, nothing fazes me now. Bring it on.
- I love being able to look less than my best but getting away with it because I’m a mother. It irritates me to be told that I look darn hot ‘for a mother’ – but I love that a tee with a political slogan, hot pants or a backless choli are met with a lot more admiration on me than on a 30 year old without kids – because my kids are a good excuse for the extra inches and the stretchmarks.
- I love having someone to blame the missing last cookie on. I love having the kids as an excuse to get away from a boring party. I love being able to draw random rubbish with a few brush strokes and not have anyone look over my shoulder and shudder in horror. I love making crazy buildings with blocks. I love re-reading childhood favourites. I love the simple pleasure of rolling a ball back and forth, my brain at rest, soaking in the pleasure of a excited little baby face and chuckles of pure joy. I love having someone to blame the funny smells on because moms don’t fart.
- I love the little shoe lying in the middle of the living room. The broken truck near the bathroom sink. The inexplicable jammy patch in the centre of my bed. I love how the tidy house has turned into a home. I love coming home to a rapturous welcome, to hands flung around my waist, to war whoops, to screams of ‘Mama listen to me first’.
- I love the different point of view. I see everything anew. I see the poverty, the injustice, I see the privilege, I see how blessed I am to have conceived and given birth to two little bratlets, I notice the yellow flower hidden by the curtain, I see all of it as two different sets of grubby fingers point them out.
And since you meme-makers have been stingy with the number of things I can write about, I shall cheat and tag ten mothers instead of five!
Aneela in Melbourne
Ritu in the NCR/Delhi
Manjushree in Bangalore
Priya in the US
Tharini in Chicago
Jammie in Karachi
Maggie in Singapore
Desigirl in UK
Gauri in Hong Kong
Candy in Amsterdam
Maid in Malaysia