Friend of Tibet

Sowmya Rajendran’s The Snow King’s Daughter is a favourite with both my kids.  Those of you who haven’t read the book can read the review on Saffron Tree (linked in the first line) and see if you’d like a copy.

We read it often and we’ve marked Tibet out on the huge map in the nursery and we often talk occupation and refugees and what not. Not in a political way, but in a simple easy-for-a-four-year-old to understand way.

A few days ago the Bean was at the dining table eating her dinner when she looked up and said, “We really need to tell the Chinese to stop being mean. They have to free Corbett.”

And then she was most annoyed when the OA and I fell off our chairs laughing at her. The OA wanted to correct her but I kicked him under the table so he shut up albeit unhappily. I just wanted to enjoy her babyness for a while more. She later remembered that it was Tibet and has corrected herself.

I’d put up the blooper on Facebook and a friend asked me how she’d heard of the Tibet issue and why such a young child knew anything about it at all. I think you’d need to read the book to realise that there are simple ways to talk to our kids about racism, injustice and other sensitive topics.

As for her age, I often wonder why we talk to kids about religion, God, teach them prayers and what not, when they’re too young to truly understand and make choices. After all most of us continue to practice the religion we were brought up in, justifying its failings and accepting every word of it as true, simply because it was fed to us so young. And it’s perhaps one of the most contentious and complex issues on earth, with saints and learned people struggling to put their thoughts in order. And yet we don’t think twice before feeding it to our kids.

Since I’m rather clearly not getting on to the religion train with both feet, I’d rather give them other things to believe in. I’d imagine its a lot easier to read up on environment, science, history and politics and find your beliefs. Things that to my mind are indisputable and leave no scope for confusion or double talk. It’s why they go to bed after ensuring that the taps are not leaking and lights are off, more religiously than bed time prayers.

It’s also why we marched around the dining table after we’d found Tibet on the map, all three of us shouting, ‘Free Tibet’. And I know I’d rather they believe in this and hopefully someday do something real for the cause than have any other beliefs that justify the bringing down of a mosque, the killing of a missionary and his young children, the defiling of a temple or the chopping of a tree.

Before we had the kids people often asked us what beliefs we’d bring them up with. I guess I have an answer now.

By the by, I am madly tripping on this song, this week.

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Baby Talk

OA: Bean, hurry up, the school gates will get locked.
Bean: Doesn’t matter dada, you just have to give the guard some money.
OA: ?!?!! You can’t do that!
Bean: Yes dada, I’ve seen other parents do it. Listen to me and it will be okay.
Ah, my little UPwaali – she has corruption in her blood and very sharp eyes. To say nothing of my utter shock and horror at what she is picking up in school, no less.

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MM: Brat, CHEW your food.
Brat: I don’t need to. I am a Diplodocus. Now I have to swallow some stones and it will help the food get digested in my stomach.
Dear God, when will this Dinosaur craze end?

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MM: Munch, I am going to sqooooze you and drink up all your juice.
Bean: I don’t have any juice. I am a human and I have only blood. If you drink that up, you will be a vampire.

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Bean: When you look in the mirror or water, you see your reflection.
MM: Clever girl, who taught you that?
Bean: Dada told me.
MM: And what does Mama tell you?
Bean: She only says ‘don’t do this and don’t do that.’

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Bean: Mama, don’t say ‘crap’. It’s a bad word. If you say it again, then…then…
Me (menacingly): Then what? What will you do about it?
Bean (hastily): Then keep saying it. I don’t care!

I think the instinct of self preservation kicked in.

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MM flirting with OA in the car while imagining kids in the backseat are fast asleep: yaadda yaada yaada… who’s your momma?

Brat: Eh? What are you talking about Ma? Dadi is his mamma. You are the Bean and my mamma.

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Reason#6549 to have a daughter – The Bean watching me apply medicine on my acne, “Don’t do that Mama. Your spots are pretty. Will a zebra look nice without its stripes?”

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Bean: Mama, are these glasses very expensive?

MM: Yes, so please be very careful while drinking from them.

Bean: Yes, that is EXACTLY what I was about to tell you.

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The Brat has decided he is a new environment superhero. He wears a ring that makes plastic disappear, it has a button that brings rain and another that grows grass.

(1) Only the Brat could come up with something like this.

(2) I wish he was really that sort of a superhero!

So much to say

…..that I’m going to keep it short.

Height of sibling rivalry: The Bean bawling loud and long, ‘But he just put a bandaid yesterday. Why doesn’t my turn ever come?’

Height of love for a grandparent: The Bean tells her father that she wants to shave her head. The OA asks why. The Bean responds, ‘Because I want to look like G’pa.’

Height of bargaining: The Brat asking for an extra hour of television, ‘Can I watch a cartoon? No? Animal Planet? No? Well, how about some news at least?’

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It’s a strange world our kids inhabit where they know what a khurpi as well as a Kindle is. A couple of days into the iPad and they know what they’re doing with it. Clearly depriving them of technology all this while didn’t damage them permanently. I hide it away and they don’t miss it or even ask for it. Nice. Let’s see how long this lasts. Thankfully the Brat still asks for the garden from the old house and the Bean wants to go to school to water the seedling she planted before the summer holidays began.

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The Brat waking a sleeping Bean: Ma, I’ll kiss her so that she wakes up smiling.

The Bean waking a sleeping Brat: Let’s rub some cake on his face, shall we?!

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How I know the Brat is a bigger influence on the Bean than I am. The Bean tells me, ‘Ma, A said that she is a good girl and I am a gandi (bad) girl.

Me: What? I hope you told her that $%#^#%^

Bean: No, I told her that she is good, I am good, everyone is good.

Errr, yes.  Clearly everyone but your mother, is good!

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Cousin J to the energetic Bean bouncing off her jet-lagged grandfather’s prone form, ‘Bean, stop jumping on his bum, he’s your grandfather!

Bean – Because he is my grandfather I can jump on his bum if I want to.

Anyone care to argue that logic?

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The doll G’pa and Nani gifted the Bean has taken over our home. I was handed the doll and told, “I’m going to office, you take care of my baby.” Ye Gods, is this what the future holds in store for me? Taking care of my grandchildren after rearing my own? What am I doing wrong?

Thankfully the maama (aka the Brat) came to the rescue and took the baby for a walk in the stroller so that I could go back to my excuse for a job.

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The piece de resistance – A jet lagged Nani falls asleep mid-lullaby and the Brat nudges her awake and asks with deep concern – “Nani, are you buffering too?”

Yes, now you give the standing ovation you’ve been holding back 😉

This and That

OK ALL. CLOSING  COMMENTS. DO GO OVER TO THEMADMOMMA.IN AND READ AND COMMENT THERE.

It’s raining and the Brat is quietly looking out. Rain in the hills is always awe-inspiring. I ask him what is fascinating him and he says in an awed voice – The lightning scribbles.

After a while the Bean points out that it is no longer raining. Merely ‘grizzling’.

Dear God, please don’t let anyone correct them.

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The Bean calls out to me – Mama, would you come and take a look at the size of this spider?!!!

I run down ready to whack the spider with something if she’s scared.

She’s crouched on her haunches, watching it weave a web.

“Shall I whack it?” I ask, brandishing a duster.

No, I want to keep it as a pet, like the fish in the bowl!!

Err.. okay then.

And that ladies and gentlemen is why in my otherwise spotless house we have a spider lazily sipping Long Island Tea.

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The Bean draws a picture of the family. Brat, Mama and herself. I look at the family of three and ask – where is Dada?

She looks at me with a don’t-you-know-anything-at-all look on her face.

He’s in your stomach, of course!

Ye Gods and little fishes, I may not be a great teacher, but what the hell are they teaching her in school?  Or should I just be hitting the gym?

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The Brat drags all his toys to my bedroom while I’m working, not really noticing how much he’s bringing in.

Once he’s done, he looks around with genuine concern and disgust and says “Mama! What a mess your room is. Why don’t you tidy it up.”

??! WTF!?

This and that

It’s raining and the Brat is quietly looking out. Rain in the hills is always awe-inspiring. I ask him what is fascinating him and he says in an awed voice – The lightning scribbles.

After a while the Bean points out that it is no longer raining. Merely ‘grizzling’.

Dear God, please don’t let anyone correct them.

————————–

The Bean calls out to me – Mama, would you come and take a look at the size of this spider?!!!

I run down ready to whack the spider with something if she’s scared.

She’s crouched on her haunches, watching it weave a web.

“Shall I whack it?” I ask, brandishing a duster.

No, I want to keep it as a pet, like the fish in the bowl!!

Err.. okay then.

And that ladies and gentlemen is why in my otherwise spotless house we have a spider lazily sipping Long Island Tea.

————————–

The Bean draws a picture of the family. Brat, Mama and herself. I look at the family of three and ask – where is Dada?

She looks at me with a don’t-you-know-anything-at-all look on her face.

He’s in your stomach, of course!

Ye Gods and little fishes, I may not be a great teacher, but what the hell are they teaching her in school?  Or should I just be hitting the gym?

————————–

The Brat drags all his toys to my bedroom while I’m working, not really noticing how much he’s bringing in.

Once he’s done, he looks around with genuine concern and disgust and says “Mama! What a mess your room is. Why don’t you tidy it up.”

??! WTF!?

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The Brat looks at an old picture of the OA and I  – “Do we look nice  ” I ask “This is even before Mama and Dada got married and had babies.”

He shrugs. “You look nice but you don’t look beautiful.”

*horrified gasp” I don’t?

“No, you only look beautiful when you wear nice clothes like sarees and bindis.”

Great – now I have Ekta Kapoor’s emissary living in my house.

Bean chips in, “I think you need to get married again and have some more babies.”

Sure. That’s a plan. So that I lose the last couple of functional joints and my three strands of hair.