Mail bag!

Dear Trolls,

I’m sick of repeating myself but  you seem to have low comprehension and thick skulls. But I love you so this one’s for you  – an entire post, only for your reading pleasure, answering all those deep, existential questions that keep you awake at night. You ask why I delete your insightful questions? Do you not have a right to ask? Do you not bleed when they cut you? Of course you do . I just delete them because they seem to have nothing to do with the matter on hand and we don’t want the issue derailed, now do we? Also, I must tell you that your language stinks. Clean up and we’ll publish you once in a while. Do you feel loved and special yet?

1. Your posts so holier than thou.

Because I am deeply insecure about my parenting skills and often need the internetz to validate what I am doing. Please, please say I have your stamp of approval before I break my heart.  I am not half as confident about my parenting as you all must be. No doubt that is why you find my posts difficult to appreciate.

OR

I am holy – please kneel down and take my blessings. More holey than righteous in fact. Look, there’s a  big hole in the knee of my pajamas.

2. Mommy bloggers are back scratchers.

Mommy bloggers have their hands full – kids, husband, jobs, homes, social lives, charity/causes, blogs  (do you want me to go on?)  At times like this it is helpful to have a friend scratch that awkward spot we can’t reach.

OR

I am guessing you’re too thick to understand the real reason which is that mostly like minded people read a particular blog which is why we get a lot of agreement on our issues. Why do you read us, again? No life of your own? Even a busy mother’s hectic life is entertaining? Too much time on your hands and an unwillingness to scratch a friend’s back and help out, huh?

3. Mommy bloggers are cliquish.

It’s called being friends. All you need to do is stick out a hand and say Hello, how do you do? Go on, you can do it. Even my four year old can. On the other hand, if you have attention problems like a spoilt three year old and imagine that kicking, biting, screaming, frothing at the mouth and cussing will get you in, you’re wrong. Ask nicely.

OR

Most of us started blogging at the same time and have a lot in common. More than kids that is, be it food, fashion, politics, films.. so much. Why not aim that accusation at film bloggers, tech bloggers or anyone else? Is it hard to imagine finding common ground with others, camaraderie? I’d suggest you look around. I am sure you will find a group for abusive, nasty little misfits and warty toads – they will welcome you with open arms.

4. You’re a hypocrite. 

And you know that how? By the spy camera you fitted in my bed room? Or because you know someone who knows someone who is married to someone who went to school with someone who lives next door to my third cousin’s wife’s step brother and they said so? Right. Of course. That makes sense.

OR

Because I agree with something that you believe I shouldn’t because of something I said somewhere else? Well, tell you what, I’ll burn up that certificate that says I am a Saint and that should do. At times I agree, at times I don’t. Yes, I am full of contradictions. What I will find acceptable in A, I will find unacceptable in B. I’m not a machine where you will get the same output each time you click on a button. I change my mind and I often write posts to admit that I have changed the way I feel. It’s called being human. Again, not something I’d imagine you understanding. The swamp under the bridge probably functions differently.

5. Your family/brother/husband/kids suck. You should all die. 

We all will. Eventually. You might go faster with all that anger you’re bottling up and taking out on the unsuspecting www.

OR

You should get counselling for allowing a glimpse into someone’s family life get you worked up to the extent where you get so nasty. Fie!

6. You never allow disagreement.

Yeah. So? My blog, my rules. What sense of entitlement makes you think you have a RIGHT to voice an opinion here? The only right you have is to read. The rest is my call. I do plan to start reservation for rude morons and then you will have your very own quota to apply under. Until then…

OR

I do. Keep it clean, don’t cuss (wash your mouth with Dettol before you address something directly to me), be less venomous and we’ll get along fine. The oldest commenters like M, n!, (damn, I need an O, P and Q!) Choxbox, Poppy, Rohini – all disagreed with me vehemently and continue to do so. They just do it in a way that shows they were brought up well, not dragged up from a well. Some are here to win popularity contests, I am not. If I don’t like the way you address me, I’ll slam the door in your face so mind your toes.

7. You spend a lot of time on the blog for someone who has kids and a job.

And this is affecting your life in what way? Did I not deliver your pizza on time? Did my kids complain about my absence? Has my boss sent you a letter complaining about my performance? Has my husband complained about my err.. performance? So then how, how, how is this either relevant or your business? Is it deep concern and love for me? In which case I can send you my bank account number – send me some money and I’ll get myself something pretty as a token of your love.

OR

Clearly efficiency and time management are not your forte. Else you’d not find mine so shocking. Would you like me to take classes in management of time? Start with skipping the blogs that obviously tick you off and leave you frothing like the coffee you’re drinking when you should be getting work done.

8. I hate you and I hate your writing. 

I’m deeply concerned. I could suggest a counsellor who will help you deal with these conflicting emotions. You hate me, but you read me… the fascination of the abomination, huh?! I understand. Even I am drawn to watching blood and gore on Dexter. On the other hand I do rein my emotions in well enough to not cuss out the person who entertains me so.

OR

Your comments are in poor taste. Refer to point # 6. Do try not to behave as though you were born in a barn and are interacting with another human for the first time in your life. If you don’t like something or someone, don’t interact with them. Didn’t momma teach you that? Also, didn’t she tell you, IF YOU DON’T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY, DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL. Send me your address and I’ll send you the Barney CD that says so.

9.  Your posts are always about how great a parent you are, how fantastic your kids are and how good looking your husband is, how happy your life is. 

Eh? Did you miss the part about the husband being grey, pockmarked and decorated with ugly toes and fingers? Clearly. Or the bit about the Brat being stubborn beyond measure? The Bean being a very plain looking child? Clearly you don’t pay attention in class. As to how great a person I am, that of course is indisputable. *takes a bow*

OR

Where in the memo does it say I must write about every part of my life, good, bad, ugly for you? Who died and made you moderator of my posts? Is it hard to imagine a person loving their life and their family? How sad are you?!

Also, perhaps you’ve missed the point of blogging. We mediocre writers whom no one will otherwise publish choose this platform to showcase how awe-effing-some we are. The blog could be about anything but the point is the same. That we’re simply terrific and no one recognises our formidable talent – Laud my photoblog and admire my great camera technique, appreciate my astute political opinion, what do you think of my hilarious Bollywood posts? Applaud my arts/craft/recipes. Critique my absolutely brilliant poetry. Marvel at my rather witty, random thoughts. Adore  my fantastic babies (that would be us “mommy bloggers”) and of course the anti-mommy bloggers who consider it infra dig to actually admit that their kids matter and say – I’m not a mommy blogger, I’m just a blogger who writes about her kids among other earth shaking matters. Whatever. We’re all navel gazers. Read, don’t read, yawn, move on. Click on the X. Get out of our faces. Get your own blog if you want to rant. Get out of our spaces. (wow! poetry, did you see that?!)

10. You say you’re tired of responding, but that is because everyone is disagreeing with you. 

Absolutely. I’m so effing brilliant that I don’t see how anyone on earth could disagree with me. I should be making government policies.

OR

I think it’s rather dense of them. They come up with the exact same thing someone 4 comments above has said and still think it’s the tactical response of the century. You might not agree, but unless you say something new, I am fast losing interest in the issue AND I also have a life that I must get back to living so that I have something to blog about tomorrow! What can I say, I have a low threshold for idiots who cannot just read the argument in the comments above them. Yawn.

Next round coming up in another post. Until the next time you get your knickers in a twist, fare thee well.

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159 thoughts on “Mail bag!

  1. that must’ve felt so good! :))

    coming out to say hi, and that i love your writing whether i agree with it or not.

  2. MM, send em your address, i am gonna send you a thanda wala glass of mango milkshake, so you can just forget abut these abysmal creatures :)just pride in the fact that you are a superwoman, with two lovely children, a god sent husband and a job:) i know of millions of would kill to get this life..well not millions. but chalo 10 to 15 in my society would.

    Absofreakinly kick@## post, and no wonder you have so many friends cheering you all the way. though m just a few weeks old on your blog, i absolutely enjoy your writing, and agree with a lot of what you have to share .

    • ooh. mango milkshake. my favourite thing in summer! thank you 🙂 honestly, i am not a superwoman. i write posts about the things i do and enjoy. i rarely write about things that go wrong or the things left in the unmended pile. i guess that is what upsets them. but hell, i didnt say i’m putting up my entire life here on reality tv. i can choose what i want about and if the so called perfection of it bothers them, that is their own stupidity. i’ve never claimed to have the perfect life. heck, they should see my pay cheque 😉

  3. Yay!! I am the first to comment..clearly i am jobless on a friday afternoon…

    As for your responses 🙂 🙂 🙂

  4. ROFL…

    But seriously that helped no?

    Just hopped in post meeting to check if you’ve posted or not and babe was I in for a blast… Hope teri peeth theek ho gayi hai, warna ek saath BP aur peeth is gonna give you a lotta trouble
    Lemme know when you are in my part of the city, have a lo…..ng pending stuff to handover ( if u still remember)

    • aati rehti hoon yaar. I just come during your work hours for a shoot and don’t like to disturb you. Let’s talk and we can meet for coffee. It’s been a while. I’ll sit on the side of the non-affected ear and talk nineteen to the dozen

  5. You ACTUALLY got all those comments? It takes all kinds, I guess. I pray they just stay away. Please don’t let them affect you.

  6. lol. you did a post to prove what, again? the followers worship the ground you walk on and the trolls hate you, so why?! hahahaha laughing my guts out, gotta appreciate your funny bone.

    • both, my dearest Vasu, both. those who love me are enjoying the post. the trolls are getting responses to their questions, everyone is happy. zimble!

      some people deserve the rudeness I dish out to them, simply because they are masochists who ask for it. Pathetic individuals who can’t keep away, although they don’t like the writing or the person but probably have such a miserable existence that even this is a joy to them. and that no matter what, they will keep crawling back for more. point proved, I guess by your return.

    • come on dude! you keep coming back and keep getting insulted? i mean, are you laughing your guts out looking at yourself in the mirror? give it a break dude!

  7. Somehow Meena’s comment above reminded me of GreatBong’s blog and the coveted iPod. 🙂

  8. what an awesome reply.. dho dala! but seriously, hats off to those who are sick enough to write such mean nasty things.. ha ha.. or are you making that to increase the TRP now :p .. am sure some will even say that.. I was just kidding! absolutely loved loved loved your mail bag response.

  9. Heya MM,

    I stumbled across your blog a few days back while surfing the net… its fun to go through your blog- been reading it like a story book. This post is so Snazzy! Mean-in-a-sarcastic way, I like that! And though I haven’t read too many blog posts of yours yet, I think I love your kids already:)

    P.S- Do you know about the National Media Centre in Gurgaon? You won’t believe your in GGN once inside that housing complex. (Asking since I read about your flat woes)

    Have an awesome weekend!!

  10. Woohooo!! This is awe-effing-some post! I just *loved* it. And loved the picture 😀

    And I hope you feel a lot better until round 2 comes up!

    Err – is there so much more for round 2?

  11. mm, am shocked to see that you get comments as mentioned to your posts…. like u said y do they bother to read ur posts… some ppl can never change… blog/real world doesnt matter to them… they need to criticize and hurt others… thats the only purpose of their holy lives…

  12. On a completely different note: Mommy bloggers – even those like me who started much later than most of you – do follow other mommy bloggers – its a really great way of getting information and knowing Im not alone. And the best part – All of you are so great that you even respond to personal queries! Even without meeting any of you – a sense of ‘knowing’ develops – I just love this blogging platform…

    • exactly. we’ve had virtual baby showers, we have travelled internationally to meet blogfriends, we know each other’s kids like a favourite nephew or niece, we have donated blood, we’ve done so much … and then they want to know why we’re thick. morons.

  13. Hi,
    Loved what u wrote.Have been a fan of ur writing since school time.Cant get better than this.Beautiful works!

    • No links left, D. I deleted the idiots. No longer have the time or energy to deal with the idiots. And no longer earnestly believe that everyone deserves a special response, even if it is to tell them to go jump 😀

  14. this blog is nothing if not animated 🙂

    best wishes for your little boy. loved the way you wrote about him. liitle boys do make us understand all the men around us better – don’t they?

  15. Hi MM, I’ve only commented once before, I think. How unpleasant for you to deal with these people!! Loved your rejoinders but really feel you are not accountable to anybody for what you write, and why. I don’t think they even deserve to be noticed, and replied to. Hope you have to deal with far less of them in the future.

  16. wow. seriously funny. is that an oxymoron? am i a moron? please halp. just reading all that is making my head spin. and i love the photo. am thinking of printing it and making a mask out if it and wearing it tonight. whatsay? sure to get me some action 😉

  17. *jaw drops* Your third cousin’s wife has a step-brother?! MM, you’re airing your dirty laundry…keep it in the closet, please! You have a holey image to maintain, remember? 😀

    P.S. screamed with laughter all thru’ the post…you’re on a roll, babe!

  18. hahahahah! you actually get such comments, I cant believe it..I do agree that sometimes you are very strong at your view points (but your blog, your posts, your ideas so one cant question that!) and we all may disagree, but writing bad language or all that nonsense in form of trolls is so stupid. Dont like it, dont read it..simple. And dont agree, then dont be rude, put across your point and listen to MM put across hers. thats it.

  19. I really don’t understand why people would waste thier time in saying all of this and by the way, cannot believe they say all of these! Who are they to say anything! Don’t like stuff here, head somewhere else. Absolutely ridiculous.
    I for one, love your posts, observations, style, kids… everything.
    Good you got it out! Have a restful day after this!

  20. *throwng my hat in the air*…..nice post MM… I Really lol-ed at-who died and made u the moderator of my posts….khee khee
    N dn’t tell me tht ppl write such nasty things-u n ur babies shud die??!! Tht’s way below the belt…. N sad…they dn’t knw the depth of these words rght?

  21. Hi,
    I have been reading your posts for quite sometime, but this is the first time I am posting a comment.
    This post is a little rude, a bit vain, a lot self indulgent and full of narcissism.
    However, I JUST LOVED IT!

      • Just to add, I think you are doing a great job with your blog. It is an effort which I feel your kids will appreciate more than anyone else when they grow up. The tiny nuggets of everyday life and the sea of emotions we sail across are lost if we do not remember them.
        I had a slightly difficult childhood and I have no real emotional connect with my family(which I have with my wife and my close friends). Now we are a young working couple and may become young working couple with kid(s) in a few years.
        Your blog shows me that it is absolutely OK to show your emotions and love to your children. I will try to be the same when I have children. I wish I had a similar parenting and could be close to my parents as well.
        P.S. Not that my parents were bad folks. They gave me decent education and set of moral values. Things are just a tad complex! 🙂

        • thank you 🙂 so nice to have non-parents read. it makes you realise that people out there are not stuck only in their own cocoons. they are interested in so many things even if they are not at that stage.

          as for your parents – i am sure they are wonderful people. what relationship is not complex? we’re not bricks, after all. every relationship has a lot of nuance and its hard to make an absolute statement about the way one feels about their parents.

          • My namaskarams to you for point no 9! Awesome only. Hey but did you really have to say those things about Brat, Bean and OA? I dont think it is an offence to believe that our family is beautiful and write about the same. Why even explain your stance?

            • I don’t either. But clearly they do. I guess its because they’ve never known contentment. I mean would they rather that I find someone else’s husband handsome?! 😀

  22. Great way to start a Friday evening! Even I feel good!
    Skipped the O, P, Q and R and giving you an S. Reading regularly … will start commenting more often.

  23. YaY! Take that you trolls 🙂

    and yes, if you have a point, please make it. Telling me that the point I am making is rubbish, is NOT a point 🙂

    *Very sadly, I have to say this at work to a few people!*

  24. Don’t even think that you are Sunny Deol with a Dhaai kilo wala haath… for me this post was a let down… I’d rather see you in one-on-one combat (ninja/abhimanyu) istyle..

    • bah. too much investment of energy and time on people who aren’t worth it. little bit of kich-kich everyday. best to lump them all in one big barrel on one single day and roll into the sea.

  25. Scanned through your post and came straight to your comments expecting fireworks… but, nothing!! Found only mommy bloggers scratching each others back.. 😦 😦

  26. HAHA! Thanks for a good laugh MM! I needed that this Friday morning! As for the trolls, they can take their sorry a#ses somewhere else! I just don’t understand why they force themselves to read something they clearly do not enjoy?! Why live such a sorry life?

  27. Awesome! i can’t imagine any troll not feeling a slap on the cheek after reading this !

    Isn’t it interesting that none of these trolls leave behind a link to where they come from…just their names?

    I’ve seen that in many posts you have requested that peple disagree politely…but if they can’t u’stand kind words, this is just what they deserve…not there is any guarantee that they’ll u’stand this !

    I really can’t comprehend why they read u if they don’t like ur psots!

  28. Chak de MM!.

    Thanks for the laugh, starting my friday morning at work with this!!

    so you were not posting troll’s comments aha! I was so looking for it in each post…poor me.. no trolls, no fighting MM..i am quitting…

    good weekend dear! enjoy the wedding this saturday and next saturday is Brat’s b’day party. God bless!

  29. Awesome!!…a befiiting tribute to the Trolls..

    I saw that you didnt have an R in the list of people who write to you…so here am I.
    not a momma yet..forget that, not even a girlfriend yet. But what the heck I love reading your blog babe for it
    gives me hope,strengthens my belief in (what would be my style of) parenting and lets me weave my dreamworld which I so want to have one day…

  30. My 2 cents..The moment to respond to the trolls they get a kick that it did affect you. Ignore them. You go silent they can’t go on for long. I know it’s not easy..i don’t blog but do have to face a lot of such people in my real life. I just ignore and walk away it shuts them up after a while.

    As for the those who were cursing the kids..can’t believe they are human.

  31. Gotta be grateful to your trolls, MM. How else could we get such beautifully witty sarcasm from you more often?!
    Kidding aside, hugs. How do you manage to calmly delete their comments? Such mean people to wish death upon kids. Eww!

    • Sorry Divya. Had to delete the link because every time something like this happens, it turns into a war. I can’ t stop my readers from going over and ripping her to pieces and frankly, she’s not even a big enough deal for me to bother with. Thanks for the tip off anyway 🙂 i dont read her so I’d never have known

  32. Hats off to u 🙂 I have been a silent reader of your blog and have loved everything you write..Love the way you write and the things you write on..Well-written post, very classy!

  33. Hi MM,

    Add a D to your collection as well 🙂 and a non mom/non GF (even)

    And 5 is just plain nasty and you really need to have crawled out of a dark, slimy place to even say that.

    Could not agree with you more…who made THEM the moderator of YOUR blog??!! We who come hear to read you do not always have to agree but it is your space and that should be respected.

    TC,
    Dee (D)

  34. What did trolls do before the Internet??

    And MM, stop calling the Bean plain-looking — she is cute and adorable and everything I read about her just makes me love her more.

    -NW

  35. Hilarious post.
    MM, Of all the troll comments, I can’t believe that someone would have a complaint on how pleasant and happy many of your posts are ( comment 9). I love to read all those happy posts. I highly appreciate your parenting skills and you gave me the hope that even in these times, it is possible to bring up a child who is not glues to the TV during leisure hours.There are many more things that I had like to add to the appreciation list, but this space is too small!

    Cheering for you ,MM!

  36. Very shocked that some people have the time and nerve to write such nasty comments, clearly they are insecure. How about getting their IP addresses and banning from this blog?

  37. What kind of a sick person would wish for # 5 just over a few blogposts. Quite ridiculous. Just take it easy MM and ignore these people.

  38. delete this post NOW! don’t scare the trolls away! Man, you are so inconsiderate towards your readers who live for the drama of a catfight in comments section.
    Come back all you bad boys and girls…she doesn’t mean any of this…her bark is worse than her bite…And I know that because I know someone who knows someone who is married to someone who went to school with someone who lives next door to MM’s third cousin’s wife’s step brother.

  39. MM, why would you do this? Why would you drive all the trolls away? The comments section won’t be so much fun anymore!

    On a more serious note, some of the things the trolls say are purely sick. How can they even wish for things like that!!! Over blogposts. The amount of nastiness in some people stuns me.

  40. wommmannnn!! this is more like it! not your usual foaming-at-the-mouth full of stupppid logic responses to the trolls, but oh what a crisp tongue-in-cheek you-are-so-awesome-mr-troll-but-guess-what-i’m-awesomer reply!

    oh i like! i like a lot! keep it coming. Aha. aha ji 😀

    yes i have thought some of the above things at one time or the other… esp that you DO seem to spend wayy too much time on the blog for somebody who has kids and a job… but then i put it down to some people just blessed with an extra pair of hands and two brains. you’re my zaphod beeblebox!

    and heck the blogosphere is full of people who have kids, write a blog and still manage another great feat- book, business, travel blah blah. u are just a measly blogger :p

    Trolls – no not all of us are mommies (yet) and not all of us nod vehemently to every word she says. but come on, a lot of those posts are fun, and if you seriously were secure about your own life, you’d feel happy for her being happy in her life. cummon! the rest which are contrary to your opinion, oh well we need differing opinions else the world will be a boring place. loosen up and you’d have a good time.

    • absolutely. people work 14 hours a day, write books, party, travel, everthing, but apparently a freelance journo can’t have time to write 2-3 posts a week. Exactly how inefficient are these people who don’t realise that my kids are school going, park-playing, afternoon-napping kids who don’t need me crawling ahead of them and blowing the dust off the path before they put their ugly pink toes down?!

  41. LOL LOL LOL
    Loved this post 🙂

    Do such people really exist? Who goes to the extent of saying such things? Especially #5?? They do deserve this kick in the rear, then.

    Why bother to read your posts when they don’t like them or you or your family?? 😮

  42. Hi MadMomma,

    Interesting post….. don’t stress, you rock!!!

    It is always good to self analyse that is one of the best ways to improve and grow.

    I am sure the reality is somewhere in the middle. The people who bother to voice the negatives are probably not worth bothering about.

    There are so many positives it is not worth over analysing the negatives.

    In an aside,

    I am mulling over another chld related thought which mixes the views of parents with the bigger question, is it ever OK to say…

    “Shhhh, don’t tell your mum”.

    What is your take on this one?

    http://beourbest.blogspot.com/

  43. err u didnt say anything about us poor lurkers who comment like once in thousand posts..boohoo.. 😀

    have a glass of buttermilk, MM. You are one blogger who makes me think abt marriage and kids 🙂 keep going

  44. loved the blog…. request the trolls to keep reading you and writing to you so that we can have another one of these.

  45. The Bean IS NOT A plain ordinary looking child. Pls take that back/strike it off this post. I am terribly fond of the Bean ( from what I read about her ) I dont care much abt the way people look, but I am highly offended by this statement.

  46. LOL! Super awesome post! You better watch out for The Return of The Trolls now though, they must be plotting out there with a vengeance. Once they’ve recovered of course 😀

  47. Baapre MM, where on earth did you find that picture – it is sooo scary!! hehee…and I cannot imagine what kind of people these trolls are to wish someone dead :((

  48. Its sad.. your posts that give me so much happiness.. its sad to know that you have to deal with all these nasty comments on such writing…

    🙂 having followed u for years.. from your old blog with trolls spamming your comment space to this rocking post! Its a huge change… U Rock MM!

  49. *grin*

    Way to go, MM! check and mate–I had no idea people could get so nasty here….hope this was enough to send them slithering back into their bills (the hindi bill).

  50. While the post was really kick-in-the-ass for the trolls. And damn funny for anyone else with a little bit of sense, I do feel bad that you get such horribly awful comments…
    And the pic! Hilarious 🙂 . Where did you get it?

  51. Hmm…I met old family friends of yours from Allahabad at some place last evening….so I missed you and came her to check you up.

    I want to ask why ? why ? why ?

  52. Did you draw the cartoonish pic Mad momma? 😛 And on the pics of the brat in his bday post: Am I right in saying that he looks almost like the OA, based on whatever pics of the OA you post on the blog?

  53. Oh! God you are so witty that you can express your anger also in a funny way! I read your blog quite regularly but exept for one time I never really commented. I love your parenting posts and since I don’t have kids yet…I feel that I don’t have much real experience to say something! But I discuss those posts of yours with my hubby and we plan for future parenting style 🙂 anyways just wanted to say hi and more power to you! 🙂

  54. My God, that was a fun post! Highly entertaining. Placid old me actually did LOL at some of your responses. (‘holey’? really??)

    Glad to know that you don’t take trolls seriously anymore. Not worth the rise in BP at all ;).

  55. i don’t know if i’m a troll – at least i don’t think i don’t look like the cute guy you have up here.

    anyway – not to bore you too much with details about me – but i have a little ben10 loving guy who watches tv, loves his junk food, loves his days out at the mall, and comes from a family who generally approves of the manners, buildings, dress and general, suburban *indianness* of all that surrounds them. his mother thinks nothing better than visiting the ac-ed mall, especially in this killing heat, and especially when she needs to change her sanitary pads when she has heavy periods. and thanks the lord for their clean bathrooms.

    the number of ladies here singing peans to your views and opinions leaves me gobsmacked.

    love you, your family, your readers, but frankly i agree with very, very little i read here.

    just saying.

    • which is great for the mother and the child since they are in agreement. It’s not me either of them need to agree with!!

      It’s sweet of you to say that you love me and the blog inspite of disagreeing – I don’t even require that of my readers. All I require is a modicum of manners and you pass that test with flying colours 🙂 the rest is not my business or my concern. My blog is merely about what I think about my life and my parenting. And yes, it is social commentary – not everyone likes it. But does that matter?

    • i mean whats wrong in agreeing to her views if that matches ours? seriously, you doubt that people who agree with her comes from no background? with no brains of our own and no proper education and such? i mean that is bleddy insulting man :)))

      • the funny thing here is, some of the friends we have made in the blogworld are those girls whom we didnt meet eye to eye? MM, remember the days when Poppy would blog? miss those days when debate was just that, a DEBATE!

  56. MM Btw, did you show this to the OA? and does he know you get such emails/comments from the trolls? if not you, he must be bothered by the sheer unpleasantness of it? cant imagine anybody saying no. 5 no matter how low they stoop. And usually the trolls take a higher moral ground?

    sorry for the second comment in two days. but read it again and was appalled at no. 5.

    • Well I won’t say you’re a troll but I will smack you. For someone who has the BB attached to their fingers right through every single dinner or movie and the iPad lying on your stomach everytime I see you, that is rich! Ask your wife how much time I spend online.

      For that matter, what about you, huh? two kids, full time job, blog, twitter and book. That is more than me :p

  57. Brilliant post ! I am actually thinking of making this my start page.:-)The trolls and what they write exactly resembles all the nastiness that one has to deal with in real life as well. same issues. good thing in online world is you dont get to see the people and can block them.

  58. Reading for so long now, MM, de-lurking now. I thought I agreed and loved everything you wrote in the beginning. Unfortunately, that isnt necessarily true right now.

    So what you are basically saying is that all the opinions expressed here are all well-thought out, well-defined decisions of yours.

    Anybody who agrees will of course be published. Anybody who disagrees, but still says something lovely about your kids/OA/tagline/header will also be published.

    Of course I do agree that profanity or being abusive about anyone, let alone their kids and husband is totally wrong.

    But the way you dismiss disagreement – ( i mean firefly, maya and other polite ppl in this world ) — is this going to be your stance now ?? — “It doesnt matter what you say cos I dont know you”. It sure is a good way to surround yourself with goodness.

    Now, have I met your standards of politeness to get this published??

    AV

    • Great… but you’re still reading, right? I don’t know why -maybe because it just gives you a different POV. I don’t know why people take such great pleasure in saying, I don’t agree with anything you say. Err.. okay.. so?!!! And it doesn’t matter either way. That is the beauty of the virtual world. If you don’t agree with everything I say, it’s highly likely that you and I are very different people and I won’t agree with what you say either.

      What I write here is something thought out by me to suit me and my life. I am open to hearing what others have to say, but I don’t see why you imagine I must agree with it. How often have you changed your mind while reading my post? We’re all adults and at this age we rarely change a way of life or a habit or thought process or ideology or political opinion If we’re debating, remember, we will argue – that is how debates work. What is it that you want to hear? “Oh you’re so right” – even if I don’t agree? That is not me.

      Anybody who is not rude will be published. If you agree on deleting profanity, what exactly is the point you are attempting to make? Because I have published more dissent than I can remember. If you selectively choose to note only those who compliment, that is entirely your call. I’m not going to go out of my way to cultivate your agreement or approval.

      I don’t dismiss disagreement, I dismiss those who imagine they can tell me how to deal with disagreement with others. It is none of their business. I don’t tell you how to conduct your life and conversation – where do you get off, telling me?! We all choose how we want to deal with dissent and I have published you, maya and firefly and chosen to delete the trolls because its my blog and I can make that call of not giving them more attention than they deserve. If I had to choose one thing I hate about blogging, it is this over-familiarity by readers who assume that they can tell you how to handle something. You wouldn’t take my advice on how to rear your kids/talk to your boss/treat your maid. Why exactly would you assume that your advice on how to handle trolls is the right way?

      We’re individuals and we draw our own lines. Your comment barely crossed the line of civility with its thinly veiled sarcasm. I don’t appreciate that in the least bit and the next time you choose to delurk I hope you will find within yourself the self control to reign in the sarcasm and actually engage in constructive debate, on the topic at hand, not my ways of dealing with it. That just gets personal. And all personal comments not related to a post, can and will be deleted. This one thankfully, was relevant.

      For all those who get rather self righteous about their rights here – Remember this is not the indiatimes or the rediff newsite. This is a PERSONAL blog. It functions like anything personal would. I will take criticism from my best friend, not from some stranger off the road. People who comment 800 times here are far more likely to get a better reception than someone like yourself delurking for the first time, only to tell me off sarcastically. It doesnt take a degree in psychology to understand that is human nature.

      I blog as a hobby – to enjoy myself, unwind and make some friends. I don’t owe any of you, anything, because this is a free site and you don’t pay me for the effort I put in here. You can agree, you can disagree, but you can take your rudeness elsewhere – reading is like a railway station but commenting is like a private restaurant. When people get drunk or rowdy, the bouncers will throw them out and the private party will continue for those who know how to behave. Don’t like the rules? Too bad. This is how it is.

      • @MM: This is it. I love this reply from you more than the post which was hugely funny too…lollll…I also think @av is being rather sarci in her/his comment. Just because she/ he enjoyed (although does point out doesnt anymore) reading your blog earlier doesnt mean they can get rude and personal!! And telling you how to handle dissent is in this instance the pot calling the kettle black!

        @maya: I am just another reader/commentor here who happens to love MM’s blog. It doesn not matter if I agree/disagree with everything she says here either. The point is that I enjoy her writing, her way with words, heck she is a journalist/writer for goodness sake! Often in my case at least, she says the exact same thing I also happen to endorse but why do I dont blog about it or write a book? Because she is the one who writes and can do it brilliantly(even for a living)!

        She has made it abundantly clear that it is her personal blog and she isnt out to change the world in any shape or form unless ofcourse she is asking for say, some help, remember the Abhishek’s cancer cause?? You as a random reader have a right to agree/disagree with anything someone writes but really this sounds downright rude and insulting in the way you have worded it : ‘the number of ladies here singing peans to your views and opinions leaves me gobsmacked’. May I ask what exactly is so shocking about many of us admiring her and expressing it over here in the comment section? What are you suggesting? Like we are some kind of idiots who may not agree with everything she says but still adore her?? Remember words have power, and when you express yourself like that, maybe somebody can get offended, like I am . Maya, MM has a skill which is the first thing any reader will notice, contents, contentious or not, will strike us later. and that is with any skill set, you notice a dancer or painter’s skill first and can critique the content later but that is not even applicable here on this blog, because it is a personal blog. Dont like , dont read. Please. But dont tell us readers how to react to the stuff she writes. It sounds insulting you know!

        @MM: Pliss feel free not to publish since I dont want a war between ur commentators. I remember that one time when we all had a free-for-all session, was it last year?? That post is now closed which is good i suppose. I also notice some of your ‘aggressive’ commentators have actually come back recently considering that they were shouting themsleves hoarse that they will never-ever read you!! What can I say, never say never baby! 🙂

        • 🙂 its okay. I’ll publish. It is your opinion. After all they just insulted all those comment here as though none of you have any brains of your own. I don’t get their point. What bothers them? That you read me? That you agree? That I don’t mind your disagreement? That we’re sort of friends beyond the blog?

          Essentially they want that you should stop agreeing with me and start agreeing with them. How is that any better?! I don’t know, but they need to deal with the bee in their bonnet/twisted knickers because its certainly not my problem!

      • I agree (So, you can publish this comment 😉 )
        No seriously, there have been some other blogs which I used to read initially but started feeling that they are not “my type” (not the same line of thinking) and so I just discontinued reading. Without posting any “I don’t agree with you” comments.
        There have been some of your posts that I don’t connect with (like the cricket post 😀 ) and so I did not comment. Period. Why spoil someone’s day with negetive comments? We bloggers do blog enjoy ourselves like you said. We have a stressful life ourselves. Why increase our stress. If you have something nice to say, please do. You’ll make our day. If you don’t, don’t bother. I don’t even know you. Please don’t stress me out more.

        The reponse was hilarious. And I think #5 was below the belt. You should have actually tracked that person out and killed him/her!

        • phew 😉 I published. Was scared I’d get another disagreement and then I’d have to pull out my cape, put my underpants over my jeans and go out and kill them.

      • Wow. I seem to have somehow gotten under the skin of some ppl, a tad more than necessary.

        Now, I think I shall go right back to my lurking ways.

        AV

        • Yes, it tends to happen if you pop out of nowhere and try to tell others how to conduct themselves (eg – tell me how to write and tell readers they are idiots who don’t have an opinion of their own) – particularly so when your comment is liberally laced with sarcasm. Now you can you lurk in peace and the readers and I will continue to interact peacefully. Everyone happy.

          On the other hand, should you feel the urge to pop out again and are ready to engage in polite and constructive conversation, there shouldn’t be a problem. We’re generous and forgiving that way.

  59. Idea…lets gather a few people and lets meet. Then lets have a disagreement and record it on video. For the trolls. We’l use stunt doubles to enact some dishum dishum too. Maybe they’l like that?

    • What they will really like is if all of you sit on me and pummel me to death. They have unresolved anger issues and only aggression will sate that hunger!

  60. I cant believe people would actually take the time to send nasty emails slamming the kids and your life.
    To me it just reeks of the whole – “if you’re life has something good going on it, I MUST bust your balloon.” If you just bought a car, I must tell you why it wasnt that smart a buy and why this is better, if you just cooked something, why it should actually taste like this bcos originally, this is how its made etc etc.
    I think we’ve seen enough polite disagreement from various people and how you’ve responded to them. What your trolls fail to see is that their language is anything but conciliatory or genuinely curious or presenting their POV without feeling like they need to make you feel unhappy.
    Again, I think we’re raised to be extremely kind and polite and then there are those who really dont have the time to consider other folks’ feelings. I hope you never let them get under ur skin again, as hard as it is. **jhappis**

    • “To me it just reeks of the whole – “if you’re life has something good going on it, I MUST bust your balloon.” If you just bought a car, I must tell you why it wasnt that smart a buy and why this is better, if you just cooked something, why it should actually taste like this bcos originally, this is how its made etc etc.”

      ha ha!! totally! and then there are these people who’re always around exclaiming how old one’s looks have become, how thin and sick one looks, how unhealthy one should be while losing charm etc. For all they know, the ‘subject’ in question could just be healthy! I, for one, wouldn’t let someone feel low telling them they are aging or how fat or dull (s)he looks! No one wants to hear that.

      MM, can’t believe you get such nasty comments! why cannot the world just be happy!!

      • 🙂 you’re right. I never understand why people have to say – How fat you’ve become! err… don’t i know it? or How much weight you’ve lost – implying that I was obese before this? Why not just smile and say – its lovely to see you?!

  61. I see you’re still feeding the trolls. Sigh. Some people refuse to heed the warnings signs that have been put up all over the place specifically warning AGAINST this.

    Seriously though – I know it feels good to vent, but this isn’t the first time you’ve done it, and it raises the question: Do you really think it’s going to make the slightest difference to them this time round?

    Look, people are stupid. Accept this, pity the fools, ignore them and keep clickity-clacking away (no reference to your knees!).

  62. Vetti girl! Your trolls are enterprising, I give them that. And imaginative. Was this the battle cry to make them come up with new ones cos frankly, the old ones have become a bit meh?

    Oh and Indu’s comments made me ROFL. They are so her! And yes, dangnabit, I miss Poppy’s blogging days.

    • They are, no? But see the new ones don’t know that the old ones have already said this.
      When you come back we’ll go to Poppy’s house and shake her up. How about some real debate, for chrissake?

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