Button up

More drama. Apparently Indian men who are usually not very demonstrative are beginning to show their affection on the ramp. So whether it was Baby B winking at his wife or Arjun Rampal putting his hands together and apologising to his wife (they’d just had an argument backstage) in front on an audience, they’re doing it all. But of course all good things must come to an end because Akshay Kumar walked off the ramp to his wife and got her to open the top button of his jeans. Some gentle soul however, couldn’t handle it and has lodged a complaint.

Apparently it was part of the choreography  – a model walking with him was supposed to unbutton Akshay’s Levis  but the man moved her hands away and walked to his wife. I found it quite amusing and in a way cute! Atleast he’s only getting his wife to unbutton his pants which is more than we can say for most of Bollywood. Even if it’s a mere gesture.

I also realise that for film stars, all this public display of affection isn’t a big deal. They’re so used to living in the public eye. So to him it wouldn’t have mattered if the model had done it anyway, but he chose to make an entertaining gesture out of it.

I’m told the courts are overburdened with cases. And I can see why. We’re becoming quite a bunch of complainants. Don’t like this – go to court, don’t like that – sue them. Sonali can’t wear a dress with a certain print, Genelia wore too short a dress for a function, yaada yaada… phew.

In this one case I really don’t get it. It might have been a little embarassing to see such a public display of affection, but it’s not like they got down and dirty right there. And if you’re at a fashion show where butts and boobs are on display anyway, you can’t be all that sheltered a creature.

And what about all those men who stop in the middle of the road to take a leak, happily unzip, display their plumbing to all the world and at times crudely flash women. I hope the gentleman who has complained about Akshay is going around town telling men to zip up so as to keep our roads clean as well as our minds. What about our films where we show so much more than a single button being opened up. Crude rape scenes where cameras zoom up skirts and wildly writhing legs – anyone old enough to remember a blind Shilpa Shirodkar being raped in Bhrashtachar? How come no one complains about that!?

Alright people – bring it on. This is one case I want to watch to the end.

Edited to add: The more I think about it – the more I realise I’m cheering the couple on. I love Akshay, I think Twinkle is looking amazing after she got married and there is something very intimate yet amusing about the gesture. The OA who doesn’t get into public displays of affection as a matter of principle, once in a while does something totally unexpected and thoroughly embarassing, just to see if he can get his wife to blush! This is just the kind of thing that would have him laughing his head off.

Anyway  – unrelated – here’s a song we both love dancing to, dedicated to Akshay and Twinkle – cheering them on. I give you, Nelly and Christina, Tilt ya head back. It’s old and wasn’t a huge hit but I love it. The best way to hear this is to blast it and feel the room pound.

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36 thoughts on “Button up

  1. There are so many things wrong with the “gentle soul”‘s complaint, I don’t even know where to begin:

    1. There was only button unzipped. No nudity, no flashing.

    2. The fashion show was definitely not a public, open to all event. It was a privately sponsored affair, open to only invitees. So unless the attendees are complaining, I don’t see the point.

    3. Obviously, Gentle Soul has never seen desi porn his entire life.

    4. Well made point about the public peeing. Why doesn’t anyone complain about that?

    5. And still, if you don’t like what you see, MOVE ON. The newspapers and internet have a lot more to offer.

    Me: only one button – thats it. and all hell broke loose… gentle soul is protecting delicate women like you and me from such immorality. the unmitigated cheek of it – a fly unbuttoned in public!! dont you know – Indian men pee through their pants on the roadside.

  2. I just read this piece and was thinking if the social worker had no other “better” social work to do. Or are these so called social workers just waiting to pounce on stuff like this?

  3. I was watching the news yesterday and the tickr on the below said “Akshay Kumar – I’m sorry if I hurt anyone’s sentiments” and I was wondering what the hell happened now?Which shallow thinking dummy got offended now?! Turns out this is the reason.Yeah I was right,shallow dummy indeed!

    Me: we should find his fan club or secretary and let him know that there are still some people out there who have the sense not to take offence. and i dont get this. should i have to apologise on air everytime some narrowminded person takes offence to my actions. it would be very hard to live life that way…

  4. Or just maybe, the concept of married couples indulging in light sexual banter is an alien concept to Gentle Soul.

    Me: I want to ask Gentle Soul if he would have been okay with the model on the ramp unbuttoning Akshay’s fly. You know – sadly this just shows the state of things where light sexual banter is something to be nipped in the bud because you know – it might lead to violence and rape on the roads… oh wait. that already happens. so then what?!

  5. You know, I don’t remember what the case was, but it was as recent as late last year, when one of the country’s Hight Courts was saddled with a ridiculous case. Luckily, it fell into the hands of a wise judge who dismissed it as rubbish and admonished the person for wasting the court’s time and money.

    Hopefully, thois will meet the same fate!

  6. And the infinite occasions where your eyes have to stand the torture of catching a glimpse of public scratches and rubs!

    Me: You bet. Although I can bet you they wont like it if women start scratching their butts in public! Its funny for a while and then its as gross as the men scratching themselves!

  7. prolly that gentle soul wanted to do the honours..
    sour grapes- J of twinkle i think.
    whatever i don’t believe akki can do anything wrng he sings so well.. he loves his wife.. he is so funny!! he can’t be wrong

  8. I watched the video yesterday and I couldn’t find anything wrong in it. It was not like he was flashing anyone. It was part of the script.

    Today there is an article which says that he did it because he was insecure of SRK who also walked the ramp. For quite sometime I have been noticing media going negative about Akshay Kumar. Don’t know if it is paid by other stars. Showbiz is murky.

    Me: could well be. and it doesnt matter what the media says. what matters is the twits who decide to go to court about it. it was part of the script – period. then catch the choreographer and the show organisers too. why just the poor guy who is merely tweaking the script slightly

    On another thought all this could be Akshay Kumar’s latest movie ‘Kambakht Ishq’s’ publicity stunt. The movie seems dumb so why not keep the stars in news.

  9. Here comes the PRUDE…lol!!

    When I saw the pictures of the fashion show & read stories, I somehow knew this is all furore material.

    Frankly, I found the Akki-Twinkle thing rather distasteful…. I’m sure there are better & more subtle ways to showcase a new style with a brand like that. And aren’t the people who are showcasing it supposed to be the most creative souls in the country?? They could’ve come up with a better gimmick to launch the new jeans.

    Me: 🙂 well not everything can be to everyone’s taste. But we also cant go to court everytime something offends our sensibilities. Specially not for such small things. It makes me wonder why this gentleman has never filed a case against all the men on the roadside who dont stop at the top button but pull the whole darn thing out and pee and stink up the roads!!

    And finally – advertising is about pulling all stops. And yes, there are things that might offend people – like the Benetton ads did once upon a time…

    As for as boobs being on display, that’s exactly why the supposed ‘wardrobe malfunctions’ raise so much hell – they’re intentional while the designs are not. Had AK walked on the ramp with the hint of an unbuttoned fly already *tries hard to prevent brain from conjuring graphic images*, maybe he would’ve been spared of all the jazz

    Me: the boobs and butts are on display even without malfunctions. you need to attend a single fashion week to see transparent tops with no bras, shorts skirts that you can look up… all sorts. anyone who attends a fashion show cant afford to be a prude.

  10. More power to these champions of Indian morality…least of all because we got this gem of a quote from the investigating cop “The complainant raised objections on Akshay’s unbutton act in public,” the officer said.
    I’m more outraged by TOI’s abuse of english than the tastefully described “unbutton act”
    Can this Anil Nair guy be persuaded to lodge a case against TOI and the officer who allegedly uttered the abomination?

    Me: no, but we can! we can be offended by such things too. why not?!

  11. Having never attended a fashion-show in my life, I guess I can afford to be a prude 😉
    No really, I agree with your last line. All my views on fashion shows are solely based on what I read online on sites like HHC or what gets published in papers – which I’m sure includes only non-sensational stuff, cleavage apart I haven’t seen any instances or flashing or so. In this case, it was a proper rehearsed & intended act & which could’ve been helped IMO.

    As far as the peeing argument is concerned, I don’t know, if one were to to bring every single man who is guilty of the offence to book, he would be fighting the cause for the rest of his life apart from the fact that the jail space would prove to be grossly inadequate!!. It’s such a widespread offence that there should be strict laws to prevent it first ideally (and basic sanitary facilities of course) – but sadly that’s hardly the case in our country 😦

    That said, I’m not on the man’s side (the one who complained – I believe he doesn’t have better things to do in life) but I can’t stand that a brand like Levi’s (of which I’m an eternal fangirl) had to resort to such *umm..wondering if it’s the right word* crudity to launch a new line & that Akki-Twinkle happily agreed to role-play their respective personal selves on a professional platform for a large crowd. The only thought that came to me on seeing it was ‘Ewww’… 😛

  12. As you’ve said it, we just become a nation of complainants.. Its crazy that in a nation with so many more pressing and worrisome issues, people are worried that Akshay Kumar’s wife unbuttoned – one button of his jeans! Talk about mountain out of a molehill!

  13. Hi MM. I love the general tone of your piece. Agree with you… I think Akshay was cute and funny. Not everyone can pull off something like that. Perhaps ‘Gentle Soul’ has such a dull life that he can’t take a good laugh.

    Also, rightful points raised about peeing and flashing. Someone once flashed a friend and me in Amsterdam so makes me think we should firstly stop crying hoarse about the Indian culture thing. Secondly how people would’ve reacted if it were Clooney or Bard Pitt who had unbuttoned instead.

  14. I think we should have a court reserved solely for these delicate souls whose sensibilities get offended so easily. And the court’s only judgment…
    “Please go and get
    1. A life
    2. A sense of humour
    3. A sense of fun”
    Court dismissed!

  15. Well said about the so-called gentle soul not caring two hoots about all the public urination, flashing and all the harassment that women undergo everyday. One button created a furor. Seriously,sometimes I have a feeling people have no life!

  16. My so-clever take on the rasjh of stupid lawsuits is that the people know well that real lawsuits, dealing with issues that DO affect quality of life, take forever to wind their way through the courts, so this is a surefire way to call attention to yourself, for whatever reason.

    Am sure the guy who filed suit has an agenda – probably up for some higher profile job or something and this is one way he figured to get his name to the front of the queue.

    A bunch of lawyers (full disclosure: family members) also agreed with me on this theory: apparently some of the jimcrack orgs that filed such frivolous lawsuits in recent years have been able to nearly double memberships and thus get more funds through such publicity.

    On a sillier note, I find it somewhat interesting that AK, whose reputation as a “playa” seems to be intact, should prefer his wife to random model 🙂

    M

  17. While I was reading this post, one news channel was brodcasting a news about lashing of a 17 year old girl in Swat…It pains me to see the condition of people in Swat…..I wonder why these so called social activists do not raise an issue of the real problems……

    It has become a fashion to pick trivial issues and then waste precious time of courts…..worse is courts not taking any action against people who are raising issues that has nothing to do with the public policy. They should punish petitioners of writs/petitions for being one on flimsy ground. This talibanised mentality is the biggest threat to this nation……Painful is the fact that all these petitioners come from literate circles…..Wonder if this the literacy is all about?

    I support AK for doing whatever he did on stage for simple reason that it was a show that had a legal approval….. the authorities know that someone will not give a religious discourse at the fashion show…..buttons will be unbuttoned, dresses will fall off and so will models…..

  18. There could be other reasons as well. Ever since this 24/7 type news coverage has started, you find a lot of such ‘gentle souls’ hogging footage and print space to get their 15 minutes of fame. The channels are happy to put in such fillers when there is no newsworthy (or relating to Varun Gandhi!) story. When I first heard of this issue, it was on a channel that was airing his Kambakht ishq footage with Kareena and basically implying that he has no morals anyway.

    If this guy didn’t like the shot, well, there’s something called a remote, for crying out loud! Erm, what was he doing watching the coverage so closely anyway? And if he can watch it, why does he need to prevent ‘our mothers and children (his words)’ from watching it, by the way? Smacks of hypocrisy, the whole non-issue.

  19. Personally, I didn’t think the stunt akshay pulled was cute or funny, it was lame, cheesy and obviously gimmicky. However, whats worse is lodging an obscenity charge against him, that’s just plain stupid. Nothing he did was against the law, if only people like the guy who complained would direct their energies to issues that actually need our attention.

  20. I think the Indian Justice system should ask people like Gentle Souls to bear the cost of the trial if it is proved that the charges were baseless and intended with deliberate malice.

    Lets see how many are interested with Akshay Kumar’s jeans then.

  21. Well, when I first saw the picture I was like wth! why would someone do that!

    But, then if it was part of the choreo and he choose her instead of the model .. well thats sweet! I saw a video on youtube and the way it has been blown over is so uncalled for. Just shows that there are too many people with waaay too much time on their hands.

    I was reading a RD article about ridiculous lawsuits in US, I guess India will soon join ’em

    -A

  22. It was a fashion show in fashion week where there was err …a lot more show of skin and this guy objects to unbuttoning jeans?? I’m surprised the cops even considered his complaint seriously! and This in a country where cops don’t blink an eye when women are slapped/molested/raped on the streets. The mind truly boggles

  23. Right. Of course this “activist” had to be a Mallu Nair and give us a bad name.

    As for the gesture, nothing very intimate about it in the videoclip I saw. Twinkle probably sexes up more for garbage disposal.
    Uber-embarrassed and pretty matter-of-fact about any proximity to the good ole one-eyed monster. She would have probably had a better time flossing her teeth. Poor Akki..not very flattering practically having to coerce the lovely missus to give him some pub(l)ic luvin’.

    So a fairly regular, “uptightyji” Indian ishtyle response and I’d imagine Anil Nair wouldave loved that. (Apart from the bit where she brushed against his family jewels of course:-)

  24. my comment didnt get submitted kal?! thats weird! or maybe not considering how bad the office internet is! (pls dont tell me about “work” only in office!;)

    anyhoo! its all crap! i mean its button fly innit? i mean you cant unzip but unbutton it! and whats a levis ad without some jazz and a naughty edge!

    the problem is when you target someone famous you get publicity! whats the point of harassing an average johny who pees on roads?!

    cheers!

  25. Cute. That’s what it is. And I think some people need to get a sense of humour to see things for what they are instead of categorical “rights” and “wrongs”.

  26. Pingback: So full of hot air… « The Mad Momma

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