A Valentine for India

So what are you planning for your loved one for Valentine? I have no idea what to do with the OA or for him so all ideas will be welcome. On the other hand, should we be discussing our plans here?Because pssstt…. the Shri Ram Sena guys are on the prowl, waiting to pounce on unsuspecting couples found celebrating. Because it’s against our cultureย  to show love and affection or celebrate it.

Between the Shri Ram Sena, Shiv Sena, Bajrang Dal, RSS and VHP, there’s very little space in this country to exercise all the freedom our constitution promises us. The media is calling them the Hindu Taliban. I think that is so wrong. We need to stop doing that. It’s almost as though we’re giving them a place and a name and accepting that they will contunue to exist. I refuse to do that. I want to put my fingers in my ears and scream and refuse to listen to anyone who says that this is here to stay.

What are all of us doing to stop this other than shaking our heads disapprovingly?? Someone here has set up an initiative and I am proud to introduce it to all of you who are in Delhi. Do join in and contribute.

Let’s stand up to the moral police. Let’s keep it non-violent. Let’s not let all traces of love be wiped out…

Here’s wishing you flowers, chocolates, champagne, candles and all else that makes your day magical and special…

PS: The NY Times writes about the issue.


45 thoughts on “A Valentine for India

  1. I want to bake a cake this time around…except that I can do anything in cooking dept except bake a cake. They always come out too dry or too moist or just plain burnt.

    Hopefully this time cake gods will smile!

    The last time around we went to a tennis match featuring Blake and Roddick. It was lot of fun and the regular crowd being diverted to fancy restaurants meant we got easy parking and an awesome match to watch!

  2. You forgot to mention BJP in the elite list…

    I dont celebrate Valentine’s day. Its against Indian culture. Its named after St. Valentine who was a Christian and it bothers my hindu sensibilities. You like a guy, fine, marry him and show your love inside the house. Flowers are living entities and killing them to show love is anti-(something I am sure)Chocolates and champagnes are non Indian things and candles are a necessity in villages without electricity. I reiterate, we dont celebrate Valentine’s day (Do you have any idea how hard it is to get a table in a restaurant if 14th Feb falls on a weekday?? This year its Saturday. I shudder at the thought.)

  3. Wow, what with exams I’ve forgotten all about it!
    I live fifty-million-gazillion-light-years away from my sweetheart, not to mention being broke. I’m a university shacker, while he is simply minting the stuff at a high-tech set up.
    So I’m thinking of doing something money can’t touch. I’ve written poems for him, and I’ve already made him an album of our times together. Soooooo, I’m thinking of starting a proper, i-will-write-regularly-i-swear blog – where he can be a co-author. We could write about general things as well as the madness of living apart. But doesnt sound romantic, does it?
    Man! I could use some ideas too! Calling on experience!! C’mon girl, help me!

  4. Loved your previous post on the Sports Day .. But well this one .. I am back again with my 2 cents. I think it is good to stand up for our rights .. be it again Barkha Dutt/NDTV or be it against the moral police. But arent we just being too inclind in bashing just one section here ? Like I said in the past that I have had the luck to travel extensively across India and live in various states. Moral Police exists across all religion. Be it in the muslim section where girls are forced to wear the burkha and put a dupatta on their head at home or the sikhs or the christians .. Yes some people do get out with Lathis and they do bash up people only that the media does nothing about it. I am completely against these people be it from any religion. But we need to be more secular when we start talking about our rights as Indians and not just point to one section of the society. Isnt honor killing another type of the same thing which exists across religion ? If we educated people stop falling pray of this religious madness and stop type casting “social sins” I think only then we can take a step forward towards a casteless society and may be towards being a true secular country from a pseudo secular one.
    and well .. on a lighter note .. My family like urs is what I call a mixed pickle ๐Ÿ™‚ We exist in all falvors and I think more families like us can make India a real secular country.

  5. Also .. I had to add that I feel that Valentines day is just a big hype by the card manufacterers. ( And this is not because I am a Hindu ๐Ÿ˜‰ ) Its just another way to make you spend money .. It used to be cards and flowers some time back now nothing less than a diamond can prove your love. ( Imagine .. in this economy .. )

  6. This Ram Sena is a blessing for couples who want to get married but are facing opposition from home. All these couples have to do is show up hand in hand in Bangalore on valentines day ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. Oh yes, Let us also ban those who spread stupid religious practices in the name of ‘youth clubs’ , coming door to door asking you to join them on palm sunday, coconut wednesdays etc… telling you that is only for youth – no religious stuff pls.

  8. have a test(TOEFL) on the 14th! Can anyone beat that?!! ๐Ÿ˜ฆ
    I`m wondering how I can contribute my two bits to this purpose. I`m not in the country right now.

  9. okay some WP glitch so I cant reply in your comment boxes
    Enchanted & GW – Where were these guys when the OA and I were facing opposition and not being allowed to marry?! useless nuts are never around when you need them.

    OJ: of course!

    Anamika – you are so right babe ๐Ÿ˜€

    Aarabi & Clueless – awesome ideas ๐Ÿ˜€

    P Gupta – I agree – moral police exist everywhere. But there is a huge difference between them setting rules for their own community and the community choosing to follow ir – or like a nafisa ali or shabana azmi – breaking away and living a more equal life – and them just randomly roaming the street and bashing up everybody.

    For instance the Church has its own rules that i dont choose to follow – about prasad etc – they can choose to excommunicate me if they wish. but they have no right to come out on the streets and prevent me from livnig my life the way i choose.

    this is about your personal liberties and not about the rules that each religion lays out. dont u think?

    as for valentines day being hype. totally with you on it. yet, if we celebrate birthdays anniversaries and more – and this is one day you get to just show you rlove – i dont think its a harmful thing. nahi?

    GP: Youโ€™re confused. What coconuts? We don’t celebrate anything that requires coconuts. but then you do sound rather ignorant to begin with ….

    And yes – I was wondering when one of you would pop up to make a nuisance of yourself. Thereโ€™s a whole difference between going door to door asking for money (which you are free to turn down – be it palm sunday or holi) and being bashed up for being out for dinner with your spouse/love.

    Iโ€™m guessing you like these groups, are frustrated because you dont have anyone to be with and it must be salt on your wounds to watch other people in love right?

    oh you poor baby.. there thereโ€ฆ *pat, pat*โ€ฆ change your attitude and you might be more likable/lovable. Until then, do try not to be a blot on the lovely, tolerant religion you are a part of, by siding with these louts.

  10. Ah, finally the spouse has an excuse not to bother with celebrating…
    And if you’re in love you dont need to celebrate na?

  11. i am sure this so called “moral police” is nothing but a group of frustated men and women who failed to woo the person they loved… and therefore jealous of the couples that move around. let’s gift them with a rose and wish them happy valentines… a campaign like “each one gift one”.

  12. Coconut wednesdays ……. ROTFL with tears in my eyes.
    GP, thanks for the laugh in the morning. I still can’t stop laughing. I will spread the word about your coconut wednesdays and make people’s day ๐Ÿ™‚

  13. MM, u think i shud get my boy to come to Bangalore, be ‘spotted’ by these guys and just tell my dad, we dint have a choice but be married off by these louts? The boy already is loving the plan… ๐Ÿ™‚

  14. How many dumb people in this world would be joining forces with the self-proclaimed misplaced-moral police? Can we, all of us who do not want to give in to this harassment, not outnumber them?

  15. oh well! M leaves for a long travel on sunday. so V day would mostly be about packing! except i am getting a tattoo as V day gift!! :p i have set an appt, just hope i dont chicken out! is it terribly regessive if i laughed lits when M said “now you will be my branded property!’ :p

    hope this awesome initiative goes off well!


  16. First things first, congrats MMโ€ฆ. a troll has finaly made his/her debut on your new blog.

    So when is the champagne gonna be popped?? ๐Ÿ˜‰

  17. You know, I am not a big one for celebrating Valentine’s Day, and I think its sheer hype. But then, I love to hear stories about who celebrated and how and my blood boils to think of unemployed louts getting ready to protect their ‘sisters’ (yeah, right, cos they can’t get them to be girlfriends ever). Why is it only ever about the sisters, btw, and not about the brothers, huh?
    I dread to think of the world we will be handing over to our kids at this rate. *shudder*

  18. I think the only reason the self appointed moral brigade does this stuff is to get attention and publicity.

    a thought – if, just if – ALL the media – the TV channels, the news papers, the internet – what if they ALL ignored the so called moral police. what if there was a total media black out. Dont give the moral brigade what they want – attention. Ignore them like they dont exist..maybe after a few months, a few years, if they realise that their antics arent getting them any publicity, they’ll stop.

    far fetched thot. for it to work would require all media to have strong consensus and commitment. impossible. sigh.

  19. I am sorry to say that the Sene has started getting results in Bangalore, my husband’s colleague who is a regular at a bar says that it was Ladies Night and ONLY 4 women were there! So the women are clearly keeping away from the pubs. The Sene chief now says that blue films were being shot at the Mangalore pub and drugs were being used, that’s why the goons attacked, it seems the police did not heed their information that prompted them to act! Now the BJP govt’s Home Minister says that there are many Congressmen who are Sene members. But I ask you where were the Sene guys last year on Valentine’s Day- no one had even heard of them in Bangalore then! The difference this year is that we have a BJP government in place. So we can put two and two together and figure out who is with whom!

  20. My boyfriend is in the US so I am not doing anything on that day. Just sent him a care package with his favorite mithai, indian tea, and chak-de india dvd. ๐Ÿ™‚

  21. While this Renuka woman ordinarily annoys me.. this time she is onto a good thing.

    PUB BHARO! PUB BHARO! PUB BHARO! Satya graha at its finest!

    Actually, what is a pub is the desi context… a bar with pool tables thing,or is it a club with dancing and a dj and a bar? When I left India the concept hadnt quite reached our shores,so I am a bit confused.

    Next trip, I shall do much Pub Bharoing!

  22. Renuka Chaudhry seems to have the balls to take on this Muthalik guy. Meanwhile NCW conveniently excused their way out of this – after their initial proclamation justice for the molested women.
    Meanwhile, does our first citizen, Madam President, have anything to say (daresay do) on the subject? Or would it be too audacious for a woman as well!!

  23. MM..even i am against the valentine day celebrations etc blah blah…not because of what is mentioned by the Sene chief or anybloody else…check what ur last sentence says…”Hereโ€™s wishing you flowers, chocolates, champagne, candles and all else that makes your day magical and specialโ€ฆ” – “your day” – you mean to say u too endorse this valentine day as teh sole day to celebrate a love so strong like yours?? or everyone else’s?…and no i do not support the sene or whoever else is doing that “shitty” business in bangalore and mangalore…but i feel valentines day is a bit too hyped nowadays in our country!!!

    Me: ๐Ÿ™‚ LOl! were you reading my blog last year? In which case you might remember that I wrote a post saying i think there is too much hype. then i linked up to Usha’s (ageslessbonding) post and realised i was wrong. there is no harm in celebrating. nobody said its the sole day. its just one of the days. just like anything else. you can celebrate love any day like you could also celebrate my or your being/existing, every single day – why on birthdays alone? its just a day picked so that particularly in these busy times, we take time out to appreciate the other. you and i might do it – but a lot of people do need that reminder and the break. and those who dont want to – why.. let them not!

  24. here is an idea MM..

    you and the OA go to Banalore.

    go to some prominent street, act like you are in your pre marriage lovey dovey phase..

    hold hands and kiss when the Sene Parivar is watching..


    they drag you and get you both married all over again..

    after they perform the cermony, you could turn back and say

    Ha ha.. we are already married to each other.. how is that?!


  25. also, I strongly encourage older couples who are poor who cannot do functions like

    shastiabthapoorthy, sadabhishegam etc.. to go and hold hands and kiss in public.

    the police will do the functions for free!


  26. Whatever happened to good old ‘Live and Let Live?’
    Poor idea seems to be slowly dying in our bechara country. I wish I could have been in

  27. Aiyo.. save me from these cows pulese !!

    … i plan to cook a great meal (dinner) for my love. One of the way to a man’s heart is always through the stomach.

    but then MM i tht you dont take TOI’s words seriously anyways ๐Ÿ™‚

  28. it is not against any culture to show love and affection. And public display of affect does not mean you can grope your gf’s boobs or try to have a Quickie in the public and if they do, there are many decent way to tell them they are wrong.. and these f**king people in the name of RELIGION are just doing atrocious things.

    This Shri Ram Sena, Shiv Sena, Bajrang Dal, RSS and VHP and who ever else is there in this DO NOT represent anything they claim to represent.

    I AM NOW SO MAD.. hopping around the office RED !! Arrrrrrrrrrrg !

  29. Yeah, as you say: Lets just hope that they are not here to say. In between which Goon gave his fellow Goon the bail? I thought he’s going to be in well through out the elections.

    Anyway, wish you too and your fmaily all the flowers and chocolates. Thank you!

  30. Hi, I couldnt find your email. And hence this comment.
    I wanted to ask you for a favour. Can you please post this link on your blog, so that maximum people get to know about it and sign?
    Its a petition to stop moral policing. And I dont know how else to publicize it, other than having the most popular bloggers show it on their posts.
    The link it as follows:
    I dunno how to create a link on this comment. But you can copy paste the URL to check it out.
    I`d be really thankful.

  31. Wasnt there a Beanie post here, just a lil while ago? Or am i imgining it?

    Me: I think its a WP glitch. people keep telling me that a new post appears, disappears and reappears. I wonder what gives…

  32. yipppeee!!!!!!i got a comment on my comment…and i have been reading you from your preggy days with bean!! almost 3???? hmm?…and i love ur conviction/stand that you take to whatever u believe in!!! – right or wrong!! hey not to offend you..just my opinion…u are a real strong woman and i envy that..

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